24 December 2009

thought attack

I can't tell if I'm growing up or growing down.

08 December 2009

spirals

What a society that we live in, where it is commonplace for women to be sucked into drugs, taken advantage of, and more often than not left to rot and die. What a society we live in where it is commonplace for people to have been sexually abused by the time they reach young adulthood. No matter what level of higher education you have reached, how "together" you are by social standards, or how hard you have tried to "make something of yourself" in this dog-eat-dog world, no one is exempt from being capable of being sucked into this heinous reality.

I have two friends from different times in my life, who have both come back into my life with similar stories. Both girls have college degrees. Both girls are brilliant. Both girls are beautiful. Both girls are dynamic and independent and inspiring. Both girls were rapidly thrust into similar circumstances where their lives spiraled downwards, interwoven in crystal meth and power-hungry men and tainted sex. Both girls found a way out, and were also able to find each other.

I am excited to see what is in the future for them, being that they are both enthusiastic about recovery. However, I can't help but be incredibly saddened by the reality of what they both had to go through, with the scars they'll have forever, and with the reality that this is all their situation really is... the reality of the world that we live in.

It's things like this that make me hopeless about the world and life and the tragedies that are crouching around seemingly every corner. And then it's things like them being alive and us re-connecting and them finding each other that make me believe in a God. It's things like this that also make me believe in a God that has some sort of hand in our lives here, and a God that maybe makes himself the most real in our pits of despair. As cliche as that concept is, it has never seemed so real to me as it does now.