23 May 2009


i'm not sleeping very well and i perpetually feel like i'm going to explode.

21 May 2009

dont tell me to pray about it

that thing is happening that happens to leon sometimes. im so overwhelmed and stressed out that i can barely even think or process or articulate. my brain hurts and feels numb. what am i even doing. how do i even know whats right; is there a right or a wrong? where did all of this even start? i cant make a decision for shit. what is wrong with me. or right.
how do i find answers within myself to make these really big decisions when i am such a cloudy mess? dont tell me to pray about it.

17 May 2009

needy girl

I just need to be surrounded by people all the time right now, and yet I've generally been a recluse for the past two weeks. I need to move to Azusa already. I need comraderie I need someone to talk on the phone with I need someone to stay up late with (it's been 3 or 4 in the morning since I got home.) I hate heart pangs.

06 May 2009

blog sucking

And now I remember why I suck at blogs. When real shit happens in my life, I am so apprehensive to write about it. I don't know where to start, don't know if I should be displaying my life on a web page anyways, and it really just feels like too much to sit and write about the present. That is why I can hardly keep up with a journal.
Maybe I'll get back to you.